Tweets by @wombstretcha503
In some states, I am known as "Dr. Buttsex." I have no idea why. I never got my degree or nothin'.

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Sympathy cards

So, I had this idea to make sympathy cards for things that genuinely happen in real life, but don't usually have cards for. Thanks for being stodgy and hyper-conservative, Hallmark.

No matter, I'll...

Posted: Jun. 19, 2015

Reality TV is BACK!

This new show is an attempt at reviving the dying "dating reality show" genre, by upping the stakes and breaking new ground. Instead of putting up with finicky, spoiled humans, the selected bachelors ...

Posted: Jun. 18, 2015

Lifetime originals

Lifetime original programming is known for tackling issues that hit home with its core demographic: women aged 20-50.

Does this fit in, or has it gone too far?

Time will tell....

Posted: Jun. 15, 2015

Nature fiiight!

Nature shows are boring. Even when they get great footage of animals fighting, it's all been done before. I propose new animal fights, still all nature, but with a few jazzy additions that make it 10x...

Posted: Jun. 12, 2015

Proverb #1

Ah, the zen philopsphy of the Far East. Such wisdom contained in but the briefest of phrases. How profound. I think I might have to meditate.

Number 1 in possibly a series?...

Posted: Jun. 09, 2015


Have you ever dreamed of a better way to manage your goiter, and/or streamline the process of purchasing goiter-related supplies?

Well, from the makers of "We're sure it's cancer" WebMD, comes Goit...

Posted: Jun. 07, 2015

Arsonist of Hope

A man travels the countryside, finding lost souls and sob stories as he goes. His magic gift with arson, however, leaves everyone he touches looking at life in a new light.

Golly, I love these hear...

Posted: Jun. 05, 2015

Waffle House Bathroom TV

You know, I used to think I hated reality TV, but sometimes they formulate just the right concept to give everyone what they really want to see. What they want to see is humanity at its worst.

I re...

Posted: Jun. 04, 2015

Adventures in clickbait #2

Ok, I'm trying once again to make the most soulless, manipulative graphic possible, for the sheer sake of pulling traffic.

I'm not quite certain I've got the hang of it yet.
I think I somehow need...

Posted: May. 28, 2015

Caveman TV

From the network that brought you "Orangutan Paternity Suit," and "America's Strongest Mormon," comes a riveting hour-long drama about an unfrozen caveman who is recruited into the Detroit Police.


Posted: May. 25, 2015

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