Tweets by @wombstretcha503
I'm a philosopher. That means I'm full of shit, like all the other philosophers.

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Thrift Store Item Guide

You ever been at a secondhand or thrift store, and are wondering about the viability of the items available for purchase?

Well, I've made a handy-dandy chart to let you know perhaps some of the ups...

Posted: Feb. 07, 2015

B-33 Weapon System

Presenting the latest in cutting-edge anti-personnel weaponry. The B-33 is the latest in Wombtech Defense Research's line of insect-related war implements.

The B-33 is suitable to any number of env...

Posted: Feb. 03, 2015

Creamed Corn

We all know that this particular foodstuff was invented specifically to provide entertainment for your gastro-intestinal tract.

Not just any entertainment, it's a damn THRILL RIDE for your shit chu...

Posted: Jan. 24, 2015

Martin Luther King Kong

This Martin Luther King Jr. day, see the carnage as a giant ape rampages through an unsuspecting, defenseless city. The townsfolk can think of no hope, outside of one man. A man with a dream... and a ...

Posted: Jan. 19, 2015


In the darkness of the arctic sea, it waited.
For years, it has shadowed the shore.
Now, a fishing expedition to the great white North will prove to be the greatest challenge for a group of friends,...

Posted: Dec. 15, 2014

Ghost Circumstance

From the depths of the popular science-fiction network's reality show department, comes the tale of a team of bold, intrepid paranormal investigators who stopped giving a shit long, long ago.


Posted: Nov. 14, 2014

Oats n' Shit

I remember back in my day, we had wholesomeness in our breakfast cereals. But it wasn't just wholesomeness, no no. There was a lot of other shit, too.

That's why I like "Oats n' Shit" these days.

Posted: Nov. 12, 2014

Pumpkin Spice Lattes for all

I've seen some bad science going around about what exactly is in Starbucks' pumpkin spice latte. I decided to do my own independent research on this, and I have the results right here. I think I point...

Posted: Nov. 11, 2014

GALLERY: Historical Quotes

I'm something of an amateur historian, and so I'll share a collection of less well-known quotes from famous historical figures. Click here to see all....

Posted: Oct. 28, 2014

Stalin in SPACE!

Terror... Soviet style!

Two brave cosmonauts, Ivan Ivanovich and Sergei Ilyich, accompany the frozen body of Josef Stalin into orbit, in order to send his body into the cosmos and send a message to...

Posted: Oct. 01, 2014

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