Quote of the moment:

I'm a philosopher. That means I'm full of shit, like all the other philosophers.


Lice: For Her!

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When you really want to show her you care, nothing says lovin' like a gift-wrapped box of Lice: For Her!

Available wherever finer parasites and lesser vermin are sold.... (Click to see more)

Posted: Jun. 13, 2013

Helping the Special People

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The original title of this book was "Helping The Retarded To Know God."

Not much better, eh? Still exploitative as hell, but there's not even any direct money in that, unlike staffing a brothel wit... (Click to see more)

Posted: Jun. 13, 2013

Meat Tarts

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Sometimes, you want the flavor of melt-in-your-mouth steak, but don't have the time to go to the steakatorium.
Well, that's where my new Meat Tarts™ come in!

Just pop 'em in the toaster, and in ... (Click to see more)

Posted: Jun. 07, 2013

Emancipate your thirst

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When you've got a thirst that makes you feel like you've been working for free for someone else for years, pick up a jug of the great Thirst Emancipator!

With electro-lytes, and all manner of other... (Click to see more)

Posted: May. 30, 2013

Happy Memorial Day

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It's good to see our veterans coming home to the things they care so dearly about.

There's always that lingering doubt in your mind that you may never see your giant sandwich ever again.

... (Click to see more)

Posted: May. 26, 2013

Johnny Facepunch

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From the depths of something, he waited.

From the masters of really annoying horror, comes the movie nobody was waiting for.


Get ready to get your face all sorts... (Click to see more)

Posted: Apr. 21, 2013

Pick up the phoooone!

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I always wanted to put together a phone sex ad, just like all the other retarded phone sex ads out there, but instead of a "sexy girl" or a "hot stud," it'd be for a horse. I would loop some barnyard ... (Click to see more)

Posted: Feb. 05, 2013

Memetics exercise.

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I usually don't dip in the the field of making my own variants on already existing internet memes, but I liked the "berks girl." I also like Onyx, and their 1992 summer jam "Black Vagina Finda," and s... (Click to see more)

Posted: Dec. 19, 2012

Color me Vladd

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Imagine a world where vampires were real, and in the early 90s, they formed an R&B group, featuring the hit single "I Want To Suck You Up."... (Click to see more)

Posted: Oct. 20, 2012

MC Hammer fights crime

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As part of his court-ordered community service, there was a brief period of time in which MC Hammer was posted up in Sasquatch country, guarding bikes all day. He did a pretty good job, and soon enoug... (Click to see more)

Posted: Jul. 03, 2012

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